Children, pets, commitments, the whole shebang!
Yes, you have baggage, why is this a bad thing? Well, it can be a turn off if YOU think it’s a bad thing. The energy you send off when you think, speak and feel about your baggage will cause others to think, speak and feel about your baggage too. Please no hiding your pretty parcel, my approach is: "date me, date my son…you lucky man!" When you do choose to let that special someone into your life, show him the whole shebang and talk proudly about your life. You’ve worked hard to build something awesome, be proud of what you have and if it isn’t a fit for that guy then send him your love, wish him all the best and move on.
Change Your Story : Visualize
Feel, see and hear what you want with emotion
Studies have shown that the brain does not know the difference between pretending and the real thing. So if you feel that something is real then it’s easier for your brain (you) to believe that it’s possible, and if you believe it is possible it’s easier for you to create it.
Many athletes use visualization techniques as part of their training and competition. Research has proven that mental rehearsal, can train minds and bodies to actually perform the skill imagined. In one of the most well-known studies on creative visualization in sports, Russian scientists compared four groups of Olympic athletes in terms of their training schedules:
- Group 1 - 100% physical training
- Group 2 - 75% physical training with 25% mental training (visualization)
- Group 3 - 50% physical training with 50% mental training (visualization)
- Group 4 - 25% physical training with 75% mental training (visualization)
Which athletes do you think performed the best?
Group 4! - with 75% of their time devoted to visualization.
So how can we use this amazing tool to change your dating life story?
I want you to take five minutes EVERY day visualizing. Five minutes is all you need, but plan the time of the day when you’re going to do this and make a daily habit of it, like brushing your teeth. I like to do this in bed before falling asleep.
Give - and feel in return - absolute, beautiful love as you fall asleep.
Envisage your partner in your everyday life, see this person hugging your children, feel him kissing you, smell him on your bed sheets, see yourself remaining a strong independent woman with her own hobbies and interests, hear your partner whispering "I love you" to you, your children, your dog - and yes, maybe even your hamster.
Use all your senses to imagine those feelings: see, feel, smell and hear it.
Do not - I repeat do not - visualize a specific person, keep that option open, have faith that the right person will be delivered to you. It’s about the feeling, not the person! Release any attachment to any particular person - see lie #7.
Feel the emotions of your end result, don’t worry about how you’re going to find him or even how you’re going to tell him about the whole package deal, go straight to the end result and enjoy!
But you will not find your soul mate (or whatever your looking for) by sitting on the couch visualizing, you need to get yourself out there and take action without thinking about the hows; open doors, say yes to invites, and just show up every day in every way to life’s magic.
Mike Dooley explains this perfectly in his analogy of a GPS system…
- Give the GPS system your destination (end-result)
- Put the car in gear and physically go - take action!
- Have patience and understand that the miracles of progress are invisible.
- So see the end result, get yourself out there and trust that it will work.
Balance: Use fine detail to describe the way you want to feel, but do not focus on a particular person or on how it will come to pass.